Self-Regard: How to Not be Your Own Worst Critic

  • Synergistx Synergistx
  • Updated:
self-regard

Understanding Self-Regard

Healthy self-regard is directly related to success. However, we are often our own worst critic. Appropriate critique of ourselves can be helpful in developing capability and character. However, excessive self-criticism focuses too much on negativity and actually cripples improvement and forward progress.  Developing a healthy self-regard helps us maintain an effective balance. The BlueEQ™ definition of self-regard is “having confidence in [our] own abilities and knowing that [we] matter and have inherent value.” Keep in mind there is a significant difference between pride and self-regard. Pride comes from a place of insecurity, whereas self-regard originates from confidence.

Psychologically safe environments – spaces in which people feel comfortable and confident sharing their opinions and being themselves without fear of criticism or judgement – cannot be formed if self-regard is underdeveloped. With the Synergistx and BlueEQ™ partnership successfully established, the goal to create psychologically safe workplaces through developing emotional intelligence is well underway. The next several posts will give a few tips on how to achieve this goal.  For now, here are a few ways you can develop self-regard.

Three Ways You Can Develop Self-Regard:

  1. Set and strive to achieve a few goals.

Set goals and determine to make them happen. We all love the feeling of checking items off a to-do list. It gives us the satisfaction of completion knowing we have successfully achieved what we set out to accomplish. To begin, create a “to-do list.” Identify a few changes you would like to initiate and set specific goals, both work and personal. Then, develop benchmarks to keep yourself accountable in achieving these goals. Finally, if you fall behind, do not quit. Instead, pick up where you left off and keep pressing on towards the targeted result. Achieving these goals and proving that you can make progress will build self-regard.

  1. Find humor in your personal imperfections.

Everyone has imperfections; we are human. It is ridiculous to pretend you do not. Furthermore, no one wants to be around people who take themselves too seriously. Without excusing unfavorable or unacceptable behavior, try to find humor in your personal imperfections. When you stop taking yourself so seriously, you show others that you accept yourself and have confidence in spite of flaws. If you portray that to others, then you will start to feel it yourself.

  1. Show patience and kindness to others.

Even though you may be able to find humor in your own imperfections, you should never overplay the flaws of others. A confident, self-regarding individual maintains respect for others. Regard for the dignity for others in the way you extend yourself builds confidence and self-regard for yourself as well as in others with whom you interact.

More on Self-Regard

These are just three important tips for developing higher self-regard and, consequently, emotional intelligence. Learn more by participating in our BlueEQ™ personal assessment and workshop. Visit our emotional intelligence page for more information about this exciting new initiative.

Do you still have questions about self-regard and how psychologically safe workplaces benefit?